News in (big) print

So now that I’ve got my age-appropriate glasses on (wink wink from behind the drugstore reading glasses that I tried on here and here and in the blurry process found out that 30 wasn’t exactly the right moment— at least for my eyes and this accessory— though they seemed so happy together) nevertheless it’s time to be serious and get down to business. And ok, I’m not sure if this counts as serious or business but you know how I have a writing program for kids (if you didn’t know that, check out their blog : writing from the rooftops) well now I will be starting a school newspaper with them! It’s already become a lot of work and yesterday we had our first official ‘meeting’ and— wow—

—but I mean, it’s going to be great, I just have to really get it organized. The cool thing is that, not only are the kids exceptional at writing, but the ones who I’ve already been working with (that you know and love : Abby, Pyper, Olivia ..perhaps.. if we can tear her away from the junior high saga I got her to start writing which documents life at her new middle school, and Raquel who you’ve yet to read much about, but will—) are now assisting me with the newspaper operations. And that’s pretty cool. They helped me run the first meeting and explain the elements of the newspaper to the interested students who came to find out what the newspaper was all about.

The girls were really enthusiastic and there to make sure everyone understood what was going on...a prime example of this came when were sitting in front of the rest of the kids and some of their parents at this initial introduction newspaper meeting, these talented, enthusiastic, helpful aforementioned girls decided to impersonate ‘Chantal’ for the crowd just so they could get to know me (this hadn't really come up before when we'd discussed what we'd do in the meeting...), so Abby took my big dark sunglasses off my head and wore them on her little face and crossed her legs under the table and made a face that I'm almost certain I never make and Pyper started writing like crazy in my notebook and Raquel reached for the multitude of bracelets on my arm that she told the rest of the group I aaaaaallllways wear... and the meeting kind of progressed like that..... so I just said something like, wow guys it sounds like you all have a lot of newspaper ideas to talk about, so why don’t you just do that now and I'll walk around and get to know you, now that you know me—

—but they are full of personality and energy and ideas and passion on and off the paper. After the meeting and before we locked up the classroom I captured some of it as I was watching Pyper dance in front of the fan...talk about charisma, just look on my flickr, none of these photographs were posed, that’s how full of life these girls are. And they really bring something into mine. So perhaps this newspaper is going to be a lot more work than I signed up for, but the potential words (and photo ops with my new cute little blue camera the Algerian gave me that’s way better than reading glasses from the drugstore as a gift at 30) are too good to miss. And so, it might take a while, but we’ll be there— to get those moments in print (...and I just might need those reading glasses by the time we’re done!)

x c

just wanted reflection : got life reflected

(six word story)

...during photo shoot with my photographer friend cristian el chico de camisa morada, i might just have convinced him to start a little photography somethin' with me... it's in the works. so what you think about that! (but he needs a blog... right?)

(more) photos : by c : here

x c

in this light--

photos : by c

in time-- in words in
silence --in every hour years
light dark eyes and will---

the tunnel, the end, in this light--

photos : by c

well, maybe i used to have a really different sort of life a few years ago, the kind where people still tell me, wow that's the kind of life i only dream about, what was it like, it must have been amazing. and sure yes it was. these days i don't even mention it anymore. time to-- because-- you see, between that and the world constructed in my mind through creativity and words, and from behind these headaches and sunglasses, i haven't seen much of reality. i haven't even looked at what's right next to me because none of it even resembled what i thought it would or should or-- or what i thought i knew i wanted it to look like. the life i was supposed to have. and that probably sounds familiar and i guess they say it never is or does or will--

photos : by c

and then i just sort of-- after all this time, started taking pictures everyday of every day with my old, temperamental digital camera. we have an on-again-off-again relationship in that it only actually takes pictures on occasions, when i hit it or shake it or when it's not telling me 'memory card error' or 'corrupt data' or when i can at least identify who is in the blurry photos. but it works. sometimes. and in these photos i've captured-- there's simplicity in the perspective, change, colors, fade, or focus. seeing things in another light or if nothing else-- trying 'in this light' and muting the shades of my words, to the simple, the corners of my world right now. corners of my mind and the corners that i've discovered right here, i was perhaps even hiding in them, and now i see, i don't have to go anywhere and they are taking me somewhere completely different.


photos : by c

it's been three years now since i moved back home from the five years of my life that i spent in paris but you won't see any pictures of eiffel towers these days, just cars and pavement buildings and suburbs for now and hours that glow when you really can't tell where i am or where any of us are. and i'm not looking away from these photographs anymore because they're even better in this light-- this isn't to say that i've figured it all out and everything is suddenly perfect for me, because you should have seen me yesterday, but i have my good moments, i don't think that the light at the end of the tunnel was just the flash of my camera, i think you were there with me and actually we both could have seen it but we just didn't-- too busy hiding in the shadows. and really, everyone has pictures of the eiffel tower, so in a way our subtle every day photos are most spectacular because no one else has captured lived laughed or written the moment in this exact light.



x c

--under construction--

not the blog, just my mind.

it's rather simple. like the old nokia cell phone i've reverted back to using in the past few weeks since my smaller more socially acceptable cell phone died. wires crossed uncrossed and now at rest. a little over a month on a new headache medication and the world seems to have slowed, calmed, nearly emptied-- through this view out the same sunglasses i always wear, it's in a light i've never seen before. simple. just phone calls received, dialed. text messages-- not enough memory to save the ones from last week so just delete and start fresh. a familiar phone-- so old i think it's probably back in style-- remember the old nokia you could drop in the gutter and take in the shower and spill coffee on and step on or drive your car over and it never broke or stopped working-- it's that one, and it works perfectly and it makes me laugh when i use it and it's easy. it's simple. {abby one of my young students thought i accidentally brought my house phone to the cafe the first time she saw it! she still calls it my house phone} but you know what, it works better than any of the fancy mobile phones i've used for years and it's reliable. the reception is unbelievable and the battery never dies it's suddenly everything i needed.

as i've often mentioned i've been battling chronic headaches for years and going through a series of new medications and treatments. the latest approach was the most drastic, and i've found some headache relief, but all at once everything else seemed to change as well, thoughts come slower and are often lost right in mid sentence, and words--- well-- i feel like we're starting over again. this has been a transforming month. another life. things are somewhat simpler, and i almost like it. but some of it has also been unbelievably frustrating and disheartening and just exhausting.

in the midst of all of this i had a visit from my dear norwegian friend and i will share some of our photographic explorations of suburbia. and then there's something that i found which i'd thought existed but also somewhat took with a grain of salt--as myth-- urban legend, turned out to be walking with me all along just like they said but-- you know how things come and go and if you listen closely you can hear me whispering it right now, but maybe you can feel it under my words, and words to come. until then, and until i figure out how to merge the new and old ways of living, thinking, functioning, observing, appreciating and most importantly writing, i might play around with posting some of the photos i've been taking lately with my really old, faulty digital camera, as for the past month, my words have been lost somewhere inside this head of mine that's trying to find its way through the pain and back again speaking the same language, and learning yours. the headaches aren't completely gone, and even though at times it makes me dizzy, somehow things stopped spinning. please excuse my unplanned absences as i adjust to all of this and still find my words, and you-- and back again.

x c

photos : by c

flight :: train de nuit :: haiku

in the fresh hours of early light awoken soft from restless warmth you--





image :: train de nuit the new chanel N°5 film
haiku :: by moi :: more here on my new blog

forgive before forgotten :: train de nuit :: haiku

dust off the window
peer in-- the world still as it
was we are could be




image :: train de nuit the new chanel N°5 film
haiku :: by moi :: more here on my new blog

train station whispers :: train de nuit :: haiku

train station whispers
dusty windows glimpse glamour
days past our time glows

image :: train de nuit the new chanel N°5 film
haiku :: by moi :: more here on my new blog

still :: train de nuit :: haiku

after all this-- train
still passes in the distance
in our distance-- still--


image :: train de nuit the new chanel N°5 film
haiku :: by moi :: more here on my new blog

somehow know :: train de nuit :: haiku

there's a whisper in
the air can't quite hear somehow
know-- it's about you



image :: train de nuit the new chanel N°5 film
haiku :: by moi :: more here on my new blog

train de nuit

train de nuit the new chanel N°5 film

i know i'm late in writing about this and posting these simply breathtaking images, but i don't think anyone will mind. this new epic chanel N°5 film/commercial came out earlier in spring and though i've watched it many times since... last night/early this morning when i'd awoken with yet another headache, this served as a delicious distraction, i'm completely swept up in the images, and the way that this small breath of a film takes mine with it and holds so many images and sights, ideas that have been sources of inspiration to me for so long....

trains play a huge role in my life and have, literally.. metaphorically.. poetically.. in paris but also in california {i didn't get my license until i was almost 30..eh hem... i'm 29 haha} and i've cherished train station glances and goodbyes, and hellos, and... and rides that went where they weren't supposed to, and train tickets at the bottom of my purse that remind me.....

the orient express. feel as though i've traveled on it so many times in my mind, in my relationships, in my passions and tastes for more... the train leaves paris {the city.. 'the one that got away' for me} and istanbul {the next stop on my travel ticket, where some of my dearest friends live, canim cok optum girls}

the colors... brilliant, muted, reflecting, deep tinged with nostalgia.... signature glow of jean-pierre jeunet {the director of amelie} who i, along with my dear crazy friend, chased through the streets of montmartre in 2001 as he conducted interviews, did press photo shoots and met with members of the amelie cast in the cafe where it was filmed. we even met him and took photos and autographs and les bises... the only two non-press, english-speaking 'fans' that were present, we were still new to paris and hadn't realized that the french don't drool over celebrities as americans do. but quand meme we had an amazing experience, and were far more refined when we sat next to audrey in our favorite cafe months later, or when my parents and i sat next to another of the film's actresses while she ate an omelet and entertained her very small baby, just the two of them, a rainy afternoon in paris, in yet another cafe.

anyway. too much writing, i'm sure you just want to look at the images, as they are lovely. i will post a few of the film stills separately with some of my train haiku from the past that seemed fitting. also, watch the film on here, or check out the chanel website the video and website it's nice to watch it on there.

:: missed chances taking you where you belong, on an old train found with the one you'd never dreamed of until today ::

a tout.... x c

knew all along

that i would always
remember that you'd always
forget----


::







photo :: carla coulson
andrew crane :: painting
haiku :: moi

more of my haiku
::
here

x c

shadows in the distance-- light

we're always meant for goodbye, again.
#sixwords




my poetry blog :: chandeliers on the floor
jerry yoon :: image

flashlight :: flash fiction :: sparks fly

i'm so invigorated by the concept and implications of the 'flash fiction' buzz. though i mostly write 'flash non-fiction' or 'flash reality fiction' or 'flash haiku' the notion surrounding this movement-of-sorts has me excited-- exhilarated-- like the h&m the zara of writing, and i'll take one in every color. now. right now.

.

.

i've been participating in flash fiction via my blogs and especially twitter, and on my down days it's the only thing that lifts me up. i will write more about this later, but for the moment it's keeping me on my toes, with the instant ability to generate inspiration and ideas, create, share and have rapid feedback from generous and talented writers-- i think i've finally found my place.

.

this is just a flash-fiction news flash, i will fill in what i left out in a later post-- right now i've gotta run-- {well gotta get ready in a flash, then run}

.

cok optum-- x c

lovely images :: carla coulson

.

never easy..

© Eni Turkeshi Photography

"It is easier to blame others than to look inward;
to see what is different about someone than to find the things we share."

obama's cairo speech 4 june 2009

::blue sweater haiku::

the bright blue sweater
lightens my dark exterior
don't always wear it



::blue sweater #haiku series::

my haiku :: here
julia galdo :: image

window curtain danced

:: heard the whistle of :: the train in your eyes open :: window curtain danced ::



more of my haiku::chandeliers::on::the::floor::

image :: leigh :: jkl designs

:: blue sweater haiku :: {.....and another sapphire remembrance}

© Eni Turkeshi Photography

:: the bright blue sweater
lightens my dark exterior
then hang it back up ::



i have this bright blue cardigan that i wear often because i love the color and it's a nice contrast to the consistently black wardrobe that hangs in my closet. the other day with my sister {when i was in santa barbara} we somehow got on the topic of my blue sweater, i was wearing it that day, and one of us {i don't recall specifics} or perhaps both of us decided that a blue sweater haiku might be in order. so as she scurried around her apartment doin' something {again, i don't recall...} i scribbled down this blue sweater haiku, and in my usual indecisive nature, created a series of final lines for the haiku that i liked and i couldn't narrow it down to just one, thus i decided to create a blue sweater haiku series, because with the simple altering of the last line, each haiku meant something, signified something completely different. this is the first in a series i'll continue... and, as always, i adore the challenge of finding the perfect images to go along with each one.

and now, i'd love to stay and chat but i've got to get dressed and ready to go! i got a new yellow sweater the other day... perhaps the next installment...? we'll see.

and ps please if you haven't yet check out my sweet friend eni's photos you can see them all right here
i often use her images with my writing. they're so colorful, capturing moments of life... she has a great series of images on istanbul that i will share soon {where she lived for many years} and also on tirana, albania the beautiful city she calls home.

bonne journee

x c

a sapphire remembrance is all i own--

Five miles above the Atlantic,
you fall into dreaming.
Somewhere between Paris and San Francisco,
the sky turns the color
of sapphire.

by a fellow twitter poet {sam} who wrote this for me last week.
{encore merci sam!} to see more of his sensitive and inspired writing
check out his blog or follow him on twitter @semaphore1

image via jerry yoon photography

this is me......

image by {one of my favs} carla coulson

they can't understand
doesn't make it easier
to realize---

::

to realize---
doesn't make it easier
they can't understand